Does Your Child Tell Porkies?

Children under the age of five often get mixed up with what is true, and what they wished was true. Parents get very concerned when their children get into the habit of avoiding the truth, making things up or denying they did something. The first reaction is often not the best one, as it is easy to imagine that if your 5 year old has just told you he has cleaned his teeth, and he clearly hasn’t, you have a future with a liar and this panics parents.

There are some ways through this interesting territory. Firstly, the more honest and truthful you are, the more likely your children will be honest and truthful. Remember that they watch you closely and are great researchers. In fact, a great place to start is to own up to your own mistakes and make amends so that your children see that everyone makes mistakes and you can put things right.

Confrontation usually forces children to lie so try to be calm, stick to the facts and don’t tempt them to lie by asking a question they are fearful of answering. “Did you help yourself to the biscuits I just bought?” Better to say, “There are some biscuits missing and I would like the person who took them, to come and see me.”

Finally, talk about how telling the truth makes you feel. Children are developing a conscience and they need to know that they will often feel uneasy, sad or worried inside when they have told a ‘porkie’ but that they can feel light, free and good by telling the truth.