How to get to Heaven from Ireland

I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting into heaven.

I asked them, “If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?”

“NO!” the children answered.

“If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?”

Again, the answer was “NO!”. By now I was starting to smile.

“Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave sweets to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into heaven?”

Again, they all answered “NO!”.

I was just bursting with pride for them.

I continued, "Then how can I get into heaven?"

A six year-old boy shouted out: "YUV GOTTA BE FOOKN” DEAD!"

It’s a curious race, the Irish.