Calming Your Fears

Fear is a normal emotion. It is part of our instinct of self preservation, but it can easily malfunction, and then one can end up trapped by their fears. Modern life is full of threats that can seem overwhelming, but it is important to keep fears in perspective – there is still far more good than bad in the world.

While there is no one has a one-size-fits-all solution to overcoming fears, there are strategies that many people find helpful.

• Think critically and separate what is possible from what is probable – use that to find perspective.

If you have a fear of flying for example, you are not alone – it is quite common. You could choose to never fly and miss out on many valuable experiences in life. However, the vast percentage of flights which take off around the world each day arrive safely and without incident. This translates to other fears as well – most dogs do not bite, many diseases are curable. Study the odds of your fear actually occurring – it is reassuring to see in black and white how unlikely it is that you will encounter your worst case scenario.

• Turn off the news

For those prone to fear and worry, the media can be your worst enemy. Be aware of how endless news coverage impacts you. Bad news stories feed on fear – often media outlets fill blank minutes and pages with ‘maybes’ and ‘possiblys.’ if you find yourself worrying unnecessarily about what you see on the news, it is fine to turn it off and spend some time away from it. If it is not a situation you have an power to change, that may be your best course of action. Redirect your focus to something which calms or inspires you.

For some people, news is fascinating and they thrive on keeping up with every new development. For others, nonstop coverage of a tragic situation just makes them more anxious.

• Don’t share you fear

Remember that the children in your family are incredibly perceptive and will pick up on your fear. They overhear much more than they ever let on and are able to create enormous mountains out of molehills. Take care to be balanced when discussing stressful situations. Being exposed to unnecessary worry is not fair for small minds.

Again, be aware of what children pick up from the media – the nightly news is not generally suitable viewing for children. Explain any events that you are discussing in terms that they will understand and reassure them that it is not something they need to worry about and why.

• Take positive steps

Information and awareness can often help alleviate fears – find out more about what concerns you. You can’t always change a situation, but if you take action, you will feel more in control. If it is world events that you lose sleep over, find out what practical step you can take to make a difference – donate your time if that is helpful.

For serious phobias, you may like to discuss professional help – start with your GP.