A word to the wise….
A man on his Harley was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, God said, 'Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.'
The biker pulled over and said, 'Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want.'
God replied, 'Your request is materialistic; think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking: the supports required reaching the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind.'
The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, 'God, I wish that I, and all men, could understand women; I want to know how they feel inside, what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say nothing's wrong, why they snap and complain when I try to help, and how we can make them truly happy…"
God replied: 'So, that bridge – do you want two lanes or four?"
- 10 years ago
For those who do not listen to the ‘Today’ programme on Radio 4, this is English humour at its best.
Right at the end of a programme recently, there was a discussion about the obscene cost of entry into Premiership football games, the cheapest price of £60 and £100 per game is not uncommon.
An older chap being interviewed said he could recall many years ago arriving at the turnstiles (it was probably West Ham United): “That will be ten quid, mate”.
“What?!” the old chap said “I could get a woman for that!”
The guy on the turnstile retorted, “Not for 45 minutes each way, with a brass band and a meat pie in the interval, you wouldn’t!”