Observations on Growing Older

Today is the oldest you've ever been, yet the youngest you'll ever be. So enjoy this day while it lasts!

– Your kids are becoming you… and you don't like them… but your grandchildren are perfect!

– Going out is good, coming home is better!

– When people say you look "Great"… they add "for your age!".

– When you needed the discount, you paid full price. Now you get discounts on everything – movies, hotels, flights – but you're too tired to use them.

– You forget names, but it's OK because other people forgot they even knew you!

– The 5 pounds you wanted to lose is now 15 and you have a better chance of losing your keys than the 15 pounds.

– You realise you're never going to be really good at anything… especially golf.

– Your spouse is counting on you to remember things you don't remember.

– The things you used to care to do, you no longer care to do, but you really do care that you don't care to do them anymore.

– Your spouse sleeps better on a lounge chair with the TV blaring than he or she does in bed. It's called their "pre-sleep".

– Remember when your mother said, "Wear clean underwear in case you GET in an accident"? Now you bring clean underwear in case you HAVE an accident!

– You used to say, "I hope my kids GET married…". Now, "I hope they STAY married!"

– You miss the days when everything worked with just an "ON" and "OFF" switch..

– When Google, iPods, email, modems were unheard of and a mouse was something that made you climb on a table.

– You tend to use more 4 letter words – "What…? When…?"

– Now that you can afford expensive jewelry, it's not safe to wear it anywhere.

– Your husband/wife has a night out with the guys or gals but is home by 9:00 P.M. Next week it will be 8:30 P.M.

– You read 100 pages into a book before you realise you've already read it.

– What used to be freckles are now liver spots.

– Everybody whispers.

– Now that your spouse has retired you'd give anything if he/she would find a job!

– You have three sizes of clothes in your closet, two of which you will never wear.

But old is good in some things: old songs, old movies, and best of all, OLD FRIENDS!

Courtesy of Bryan