Humour

An elderly couple were celebrating their sixtieth anniversary.

In my next life, I'd like to come back as a bear.

An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. "You don't want to try these techniques at home."

A man goes into a pet shop, wanting to buy a bird. He sees a beautiful bird, the loveliest he's ever seen, and asks how much it is.

A champion jockey is about to enter an important race on a new horse. The horse's trainer meets him before the race to offer some advice.

A man was seen fleeing down the hall of the hospital just before his operation. "What's the matter?" he was asked.

A duck walks into a pub and orders a pint of beer and a ham sandwich.

I just came across this exercise suggested for seniors to build muscle strength in the arms and shoulders. It seems easy, so I thought I'd pass it on to some of my friends.

At the very first chance, Bob's friends corner him and ask, "Bob, how'd you get the trophy girlfriend?". Bob replies, "Girlfriend? She's my wife!".

An American tourist in London was desperate to take a leak. Soon he finds out that some grudges just don't go away.