Making A Good First Impression

Sometimes one creates a dynamic impression by saying something, and sometimes one creates as significant an impression by remaining silent. Dalai Lama

At a recent ‘Pre-retirement planning” workshop I was running there was a lot of talk about how to get a job after you have finished your “first career.” Then we talked about the importance of making new friends, and how we do that, when we can no longer rely on work friends. The conversation turned to how to you make a good impression when we meet people.

We have all heard this warning: “You never get a second chance to make a good first impression and it only takes between 7 and 17 seconds for strangers to form an opinion of you.”

Bearing this in mind here are some pointers on how to make a good first impression.

Be “other-centred”
Have you ever been in a situation with a group of people where most make good impressions, but one person emerges as someone you wish to avoid? Such people are likely to talk about themselves non-stop. Only rarely do others get a chance to speak.

The best way to make a positive first impression is to demonstrate immediately that the other person – not you – is the centre of action and conversation. If you indicate that the spotlight is on you only, then you miss opportunities for friendships, jobs, and networking. Show that you are other-centered, that you are interested in what they have to say, and first-time acquaintances will be eager to see you again.

Be a good listener
You will make a superb initial impression when you demonstrate good listening skills. Give positive verbal cues: “Hmmm. . . interesting!” “Tell me more, please.” “What did you do next?” Just as actors benefit from prompts, your conversational partner will welcome your assistance in keeping the exchange going.
Also think about your body language. We show we are skilled listeners by maintaining steady eye contact.

Name them
Use the name of a new acquaintance frequently. “Mary, I like that suggestion.” “Your holiday must have been exciting, John.” This demonstrates firstly that you paid attention and caught the name during the introduction. Secondly, the conversation becomes more personal by including the listener’s name several times.

Be careful with humour
Although a joke or two might be a good icebreaker, stay away from sarcastic remarks that could backfire. Because you don’t know a stranger’s sensitivities, prolonged joking might establish barriers you cannot overcome easily.

You don’t need to be right
Confrontations with somebody you have just met will not help with building rapport. Wait until you have established credibility before you challenge another’s statements.

I hope these ideas will help increase your confidence with professional and social encounters..

“In the same way that I tend to make up my mind about people within thirty seconds of meeting them, I also make up my mind about whether a business proposal excites me within about thirty seconds of looking at it. I rely far more on gut instinct than researching huge amounts of statistics.”
― Richard Branson
By Ron Tustin
Motivating baby boomers to see the world with fresh eyes.

www.reviveandthrivecoaching.com