The emotional and mental toll urinary incontinence (UI) can take, is ubiquitous. Around the world, especially where understanding and acceptance of the issue is less well understood, sufferers have been ostracised, abandoned, and even forcibly removed from their own homes. However, here in NZ, we’re so much more accepting and understanding – or are we? Even in Godzone, those who deal with UI on a daily basis have often felt criticised, ignored, unsupported, and even ostracised. Then there’s the issue of how people grappling with UI often treat themselves! In our next article on UI, we’ll discuss how to manage UI (and manage those who don’t understand what sufferers are going through). For now, let’s take a close look at the toll UI can take on the mental and emotional health of those who live with the challenge on a daily basis.
Same but different
Research shows, sadly, UI sufferers can have a significantly poorer life experience than those without the condition. What’s more, the various forms UI can take, can also dictate the difficulty experienced. For example, women with an overactive bladder tend to suffer more emotional distress than those with, say, stress incontinence. Added to the complexity of UI is other, co-existing conditions (such as stress and anxiety) can exacerbate UI. It makes for a potent cocktail of mental and emotional strain.
Always in the background
For many with UI, the anxiety associated with the condition is always with them. When you fear laughing will trigger UI, you can soon become reluctant to enjoy the moment. When you fear something as potentially enjoyable as a brisk walk in the park with a friend can trigger UI, you wonder whether it’s worth venturing out. As for a long car journey (especially in a vehicle that’s not your own), when the unthinkable could happen at any moment, why would you even agree to an outing. Anxiety is wearying, both physically and mentally. It drains energy and saps enthusiasm, leaving many with UI to lose their confidence and self-esteem.
Mental health
Loss self-esteem and confidence can often result in social isolation because, when a UI sufferer is always on guard for leakage, it can feel so much easier to stay at home than to meet up with friends. When social isolation then meets the physical exhaustion brought on by conditions such as nocturia (the frequent need to empty the bladder at night), and the sheer effort involved in changing and disposing of incontinence wear, it’s no wonder mental health can take a tumble. So much so, it has been suggested 28% of women with an overactive bladder suffer from depression. The difficulty of dealing with UI can show up in bouts of frustration, changes in eating habits, emotional numbness, and an increased consumption of alcohol. All-in all, UI is not a minor issue!
Relationships suffer, too
UI doesn’t only affect a sufferer, it impacts their significant other, too. A 2025 study of women experiencing UI (leakage) concluded 3 out of 5 females avoided sexual intercourse because of concerns about their condition. When partner intimacy becomes an issue, managing a relationship can become stressful, even when partners are understanding. In fact, it is often the demands a UI sufferer can put on themselves that can be at the heart of the difficulties.
Work place worries
UI isn’t restricted to seniors – far from it. In fact, the condition affects far more working age men and women than we know about given sufferers are unlikely to report the problem to employers. The need to frequently use the bathroom can be stressful when supervisors are aware of productivity loss, while sufferers also bear the cost of supplying themselves with the most ‘high tech’ incontinence wear, especially when working with the public. While someone with UI may be willing to discuss their challenges with a close friend, they are often silent when it comes to discussing the problem with their colleagues. Consequently, they remain unsupported in their places of work – something which is emotionally challenging.
It is difficult to imagine a condition which affects almost every aspect of daily life as much as UI does. However, management is the key to regaining confidence and self-esteem. Look out for our next article where we discuss the importance of self-help in UI management.
