According to the 2018 census (we’re still waiting for the results of the 2023 census), of all the single households in New Zealand, women in the 65-69 year old bracket make up the greatest proportion (there are almost 25,000 of them). There are almost as many women in the 70-74 year old age bracket, who live alone. And tens of thousands of older men are in the same situation.
Given one of the ways human beings most often connect, is over food, how can folk who live alone make their mealtime experiences more sociable and enjoyable? We have some tips to make it happen:
Busy breakfast
Time your breakfast for the most active part of the morning (when workers are heading for the bus, and children are on their way to school), and move your breakfast table to a window where you can see it all happening. Turn on breakfast radio, pop the toast, pour your cuppa, and gaze out at the world while you crunch on your cereal. After a few days, you’ll come to recognise the same faces. Those same faces may even come to recognise you, and give you a wave!
Lunch with feathered friends
Set up a bird feeding table outside a window where you like to eat lunch. Before you sit down with your midday snack, top up the bird feeder, and enjoy watching your feathered friends fly in for their own lunch. The movement of wings, and the antics the birds get up to, will liven up your lunchtime.
Dinner date at a distance
During the long Covid lockdowns, friendship groups regularly met up on Zoom for pre-dinner drinks and a social catch-up. You can do the same over dinner whenever you want to. Just contact a friend or relative who also lives alone, and arrange to WhatsApp or Message each other (use the video connection to make it more ‘live’) while you chat over your respective dinners. Make sure you have a glass of something special to toast each other with. If you want to liven up the dinner date, prearrange to cook the same recipe, and compare the results. Winner gets bragging rights!
Invite a child
Children love to be spoiled, and there’s no better way than to spoil them with your time. If you have a child in your life – whether it’s a grandie or a little neighbour you babysit for at time, plan an early evening meal occasionally, and arrange with their parent for the child to join you, on their own, for a special dinner. Be sure to check what they do and don’t like to eat, and include a favourite desert!
Pets are company, too
Train your moggy or dog to expect their dinner at the same time as you eat yours. It will bring them into the house at the very time you want their company.
Desert night!
We’re all allowed a treat now and again. Make yours a once-a-week ice-cream desert from a shop within walking distance (a neighbour who lives alone may welcome the opportunity to join you). After you’ve finished your meal, head out the door for the treat. Enjoy chatting to anyone you meet on the way, and be sure to make some conversation with whoever is serving you.
TV dinner
Mindlessly staring at the box, while eating, isn’t a great way to make the most of a meal. But if you have a favourite programme you look forward to each week, why not plan a deliciousl meal around it? Prepare the meal ahead of time so you’re not rushed, and keep the TV off until your programme is ready to start. Pour yourself a cuppa or a glass of wine, sit down to watch and eat, and you’ve created a special occasion with little effort.
Shared takeaways
Sharing a weekly meal with a friend is a great way to dine with company, but it can quickly turn into a burden, even if you take turns at cooking. Make your shared meal a take-away, instead, and the problem is solved. Pick up a selection of take-out menus from local eateriesm for you and your friend, and schedule a phone conversation earlier in the day to decide what to order. Just because it’s a take-away, you can still make it an occasion by setting the table with a pretty cloth, china plates, and a vase of fresh flowers.
Living alone doesn’t always have to mean dining alone. Look for ways to socialise over food, whenever you can.