Many times during my years as a family coach, I’ve been asked about how parents and grandparents can make sure teens aren’t falling into a ‘bored rut’ during the school holidays when one or both parents are still hard at work, and it’s especially important to ask this question at a time and age like this when buying them the latest Xbox game and plonking them down in front of the TV for the holidays seems like the easiest option.
The key aspect of boredom is being unproductive, and many young people get very impatient when there’s ‘nothing to do’ – after all, they’re in their element when there’s something going on all the time – think the instant gratification of a world they’ve grown up in.
So here are a few tips I’ve picked up on, and have found actually work as win-win solutions for pre-teens & teens, grandparents and their parents
Tip 1: Give Them Their Own Time (But Add Balance)
At the end of the school year, teens feel like they’ve finally got some sense of freedom, and with exams finally over, they need to relax. Let them sleep in or relax, but suggest setting aside part of their day for something purposeful. Teens value autonomy, so giving them room to decompress while encouraging a mix of chill time and structured activities works well.
Tip 2: Decide on the Rules of Socialising
Instead of focusing solely on rules for having friends over, open up options for socialising in other ways. Suggest meeting their friends at a local park, mall, or café. If hosting friends, create an activity (like a movie marathon or baking session) that makes your place the fun spot.
Tip 3: Get Them To Plan Out Their Week
I thought this was the lamest thing I had ever heard when a colleague told me about this, but it works. When you pose the challenge to your teens to plan out their week, it gives them time to search online to see what’s going on in the local area, and actually realise there is a world outside of the house! Alternatively, you could propose smaller challenges:
- Visit a new place (like a local museum or hiking trail).
- Learn a skill online (photography, coding, or creative writing).
- Try a “30-day challenge” – fitness, journaling, or art.
Apps like Pinterest or TikTok can help spark ideas.
Tip 4: Give Them the Task of Making Dinner
With all the cooking shows going around, many younger people are getting into cooking (think Junior MasterChef). When you’re leaving for work, leave them a budget and the challenge to surprise you with a special dinner. If this suggestion is meet with resistance, gamify the task:
- “Mystery Box Challenge” – give them three random ingredients to incorporate.
- Have them plan and cook a dish from another culture.
- Reward them for cooking a complete meal by letting them pick a movie or activity for the evening.
Tip 5: Busy Business
Plant an idea in their head about starting up a business. Encourage them to explore trending side hustles:
- Designing T-shirts, stickers, or other items with Canva to then sell on platforms like Etsy, or Facebook Marketplace.
- Starting a small business like dog walking, tech tutoring, or setting up a holiday gift-wrapping service.
This taps into entrepreneurial skills while leveraging their tech-savvy nature. Or perhaps start with getting them to list some of your household’s unwanted items on TradeMe – it could be their pocket money! With the internet, anything is possible.
Tip 6: Hand Them a Camera or Art Supplies, and Watch…
Young people have a wild imagination, so help harness and unleash this through art – this will give them hours of time to spend on something that will help them express their creativity. Incorporate tools they already use for art, music, or video creation:
- Explore TikTok trends like short skits or editing transitions.
- Try digital art programs like Procreate or Canva.
- Suggest they start a YouTube channel or blog to showcase their hobbies or ideas.
Tip 7: Endorse Sport
Suggest some sports they can go play with their friends – if you have the equipment for it, just hand it to them – they may have forgotten you still have a set of tennis racquets in the garage, or not even begin to imagine the sorts of treasures you possess hiding away in some spot in the house! You could also suggest activities with a social or adventurous twist:
- Book an escape room experience or obstacle course.
- Sign them up for classes like martial arts, rock climbing, or even dance.
Tip 8: Help with Family Projects
Instead of Christmas cards or tree decorating, involve them in:
- Helping set up holiday lights or outdoor decorations.
- Digitising family photos or creating a scrapbook.
- Planning a holiday playlist or putting together a video montage of family memories.
Tip 9: Volunteer for a Cause
Encourage them to use their free time for something meaningful:
- Help at a local animal shelter, soup kitchen, or charity shop.
- Get involved in an environmental project like a beach or park clean-up.
Volunteering looks great on CVs and can inspire a sense of accomplishment.
Additional Ideas
1. Create a Holiday Bucket List:
Work together to brainstorm holiday-specific goals like learning a new TikTok dance, baking cookies from scratch, or completing a puzzle marathon.
2. Host a Themed Day at Home:
Dedicate a day to a specific theme – like a DIY spa day, a retro gaming marathon, or even challenge them to a day “unplugged” from devices.
3. Learn a New Skill Together:
Introduce them to activities they may not consider but could enjoy, like knitting, gardening, or woodworking. Doing it together makes it feel less like a chore.
What are some of the ways you get your teenagers out of the ‘boredom rut’?