You can say ‘we should’ ’till the cows comes home, but if you don’t actually carry out your intentions, nothing is going to change. It’s the same with building healthy relationships – especially as the years progress and couples often start to take each other for granted. No matter how ‘trite’ some of the following tips to boost your relationship may seem at first glance, when you practise them regularly, you may be surprised to see how your relationship blossoms. Why not test drive your favourites from the suggestions below!
- Call your partner by uplifting or romantic names such as ‘gorgeous,’ ‘my hero,’ ‘my love,’ ‘master-chef,’ ‘darling.’ Write your own list and use it regularly!
- Keep a stash of treats you know your partner likes (a special chocolate, soap, scented candle, wine, dried fruit or nuts) and bring it out as a gift when they least expect it.
- Hold hands next time you’re out walking – if your partner asks ‘why,’ tell them it’s because you love them.
- Kiss your partner good morning (every morning) before you get out of bed.
- Put fresh flowers on your partner’s bedside table on the same day each week. They’ll soon come to expect it, and miss it if you don’t.
- Send a ‘Thank You’ text to your partner at least twice a week (every week). It doesn’t have to be for anything major – try ‘Thank you for loading the dishwasher,’ or ‘Thank you for organising my doctor’s appointment.’
- Leave what you’re doing when your partner returns home, ask them how their errand/meeting/meet-up went, and actively listen to their answer. If they shrug, tell them you’re really interested.
- Make a special effort with the table setting for one meal a week.
- Look into your partner’s eyes when you’re listening to them.
- Next time you’re going out, compliment your partner on the way they look.
- Head to bed at the same time – it’s a great time to chat, even if romance isn’t on the agenda.
- Remind your partner of what made you first fall in love with them.
- Show your partner physical contact when you’re in a group by placing a hand on their arm or back – it lets others know how much you appreciate them, and that’s a morale booster!
- Tell others, within your partner’s hearing, of something special they’ve done for you, or what it is you appreciate about them.
- Take a daily walk together – and turn off your phones. If you don’t usually have much to talk about, what you see around you will stimulate conversation.
- Pop some photos of your younger selves on the door of the fridge. It will remind you both of why you fell in love (or give you some smiles, at the very least).
- Keep your bedroom tidy and looking at its best. Romance is unlikely to be rekindled amidst chaos and clutter.
- Start a sentence (every day) with “I like the way …” It might be ‘I like the way you’ve organised the garage,’ or “I like the way you took your aunt shopping,’ or “I like the way you drive – it makes me feel safe.”
- Give out of the blue compliments every day for a week until you get used to it. Out of the blue compliments can be: “I’m so lucky to have you!” or “I’m glad I have you to grow older with.”
One of the best things about using relationship boosters is it doesn’t have to be a two-way thing in order to reap the benefits. Start showering your significant other with some of the boosters above, and before long, you’ll very likely hear them coming back to you!