Mistakes That Grandparents Should Avoid

There are many mistakes that grandparents make with their grandchildren, and all this is meant in the name of caring and love. The bond between a grandparent and the grandchild is like no other. The intentions from grandparents are good ones, and there is no relationships that have mistakes. Any person who has the opportunity to have a grandchild is overjoyed and, of course, wants to do everything they can to make that grandchild happy. Roles, relationships, as well as identities, shift. It is, therefore, very important to know that there is a difference between being a parent and being a grandparent. In most cases, this relationship will have conflicts.

One of the mistakes that grandparents often create is not preparing for this newest bundle of joy. A good way of preparing you as a grandparent is to talk to the parents (your very own children) about being specific with respect to their feelings and ideas about how they want to raise their children. And this is because the parents are the linchpin of the relationship between the grandparent and the grandchild. Most grandparents fail to listen and this is a mistake. The relationship between grandparent and grandchild should be based on open line communication. Even though it takes effort to listen to parent and grandchild alike, it is worth every minute of the investment. As a grandparent, you need to sharpen your listening skills. This will greatly improve the communication between you and your grandchild.

No matter where your grandchild lives, it is important to stay in touch on a regular basis — a big part of communication. Several things you can do to make ensure this — call your grandchildren on a regular basis, send emails, or even buy a fax machine if the need arises. As a grandparent, you are not supposed to be on bad terms with your in laws or the grandchild's parents. The parents need support, even though they may sometimes seem insecure, never criticize them. Always stay in good terms with in-laws as well as the parents. Allow the parents to make their own mistakes so that they can learn from them the same way you did.

As a grandparent you are not supposed to be judgmental. Make it you priority to fight any urge to take control. Grandparents should also recognize that they require growth and this is because there are changes in personality as well as attitude. You should always keep an open mind on the new trends around such things as music, clothing, and hairstyles (for both girls and boys). You should know that even though the outside may look different — it is the inside and are basically all the same. All grandkids need their grandparent's consistent and unconditional love.

Apart from the normal calls, you should spend one-on-one time with your grandchild. Most grandparents make this mistake. You should know that even though family get-togethers are good, grandchildren also need personal attention. This should be done in a relaxed atmosphere where the grandchild feels free to share his/her feelings, dreams, as well as goals. You should also share their world, even though the generation may seem different from your own. Most grandparents also make the mistake of telling their grandchildren stories of their childhood thinking they will not be cool — but they are — grandchildren love to hear stories from the past.

Remember it is important to lead by example (no matter where your grandchild is in life) — your words will be quoted through the generations.

By Veronica Scott