A Scot, an Englishman and an Irish man were serving in Nelson’s Navy. As sailors often did, they broke some naval regulations. They were each sentenced to 200 lashes.
On the day they were to get their lashes the Englishman went first. The doctor in charge asked him ‘This is going to be very painful, what do you want on your back to ease the wounds?’
‘Just slather on goose grease’ said the Englishman
The man took his punishment and was carried to the sick bay to recover.
The Scot was next.
When he was asked the same question he replied, ‘Naethin. I’m a true Scot. I dinna need annathing.’
He took his punishment and managed to walk away and down to the sick bay
Next was the Irishman
‘What do want on your back’ he was asked.
The Irishman quickly replied
‘The big Scotsman!’