Most of us, once we reach a certain point in life, stop going to a certain type of place, namely: singles bars. And, while it is unlikely you will actually be prevented from going in to one, the question is really whether or not you want to go to that sort of place any more. And, if you do go to one, are you likely to be comfortable competing with the various twenty- or thirty-something’s that do usually frequent them? The answer is “probably not.” So, in that case, what are your other options for meeting someone new?
Church groups are one option. The odds are, that at fifty plus, you will probably have settled on a church, and would likely prefer to date someone outside of your present social scene. There are many other church groups, depending on the area you live in, that would welcome a new member, and are worth a look.
Activity groups are another. Seniors’ associations, kayaking groups, photography clubs are all likely places where you have a good chance of meeting someone with similar interests to your own. On the other hand, perhaps it’s time for a new hobby, and you might like to join a club or group that encourages a different activity to the ones you are used to. Chambers of Commerce, professional organizations, Lions clubs will all provide similar opportunities.
The grocery store. Without coming across as a desperate stalker-type, a quick glance into somebody else’s grocery store trolley should give you an idea of whether or not that person is single. It may also give you a clue as to whether or not you might be interested in that person. The guy with a dozen bottles of wine, two bottles of gin and three frozen meals might not be exactly what you had in mind. On the other hand, he might be the perfect complement. Many a romance has blossomed in the frozen food aisle.
Online dating services. There has been a big increase in the amount of and type of online dating services for a reason. It is hard to meet someone new without a substantial investment of time and effort on your part. Online dating services take a lot of the work out of it. It could take dozens of dates before you finally meet that non-smoking atheist with an interest in nature and walking that you have your heart set on. Most of the services do a very good job of vetting candidates before allowing them to join their network and there is a good chance that what you see advertised on the site is what will arrive for the date. They also give you the opportunity to start developing the relationship before actually meeting, either via email or phone. One of the most uncomfortable situations during dating is the first date and discovering something about the other person that you absolutely couldn’t live with. Using an online dating service takes that out of the equation. You will probably have been asked a comprehensive list of questions when you signed up for the service that will ensure that you never have to experience that nightmare first date. You know the one, where you discover that all he really wants is a casual sex relationship or that she would never consider a long-term relationship with an agnostic lapsed Jew that is allergic to walnuts and despises Beethoven.
All in all, there are a lot of possibilities and opportunities to meet new people. It may mean that you have to “think outside the box.” But if you are prepared to expand your horizons a little, perhaps by joining a club that you wouldn’t have thought of before or signing up for an online dating service, you may well find that there are more people than you thought in a situation similar to your own.
Article by Judy Porter