Coping with sadness

Feeling sad? Try this.

“The word ‘happiness’ would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness.” Carl Jung

We all have times in our lives when we are feeling sad or miserable about something for one reason or another. We may walk around feeling totally drained and numb.

So what can we do about it? Or how can we help someone else who may be feeling like this?

Firstly, feel happy that we are aware of the sad feeling. This means we are alive, and this miserable, sad state is not who we really are. Then decide to do something about it. It is our choice and no one else’s as to what we do now. Although we may not be able to change the situation that has made us feel this way, we can take action to change the feelings we have.

Next, knowing that we are not happy, we now have the power to choose to be happy. We are still allowed to acknowledge our sad feeling, but then let it go. Do not let it control us. We can do this if we “live in the moment”, an expression we hear often. All I mean by this, is to be conscious, aware and in the present with all of our senses. It means not to dwell on the past, nor be anxious or worry about the future.

By living in the moment, we can change those recent negative feelings into happy, energised ones. This may feel like an enormous task at times but it is important that we realise that the more good feelings we send out, the more we will attract similar ones back to us.

Being in the moment:

• Helps us to forgive and forget unhappy situations of the past.
• Helps us to not focus and worry about a future that is not here yet.
• Makes us much more confident to make decisions based on now, not on what would, could, and should have been.
• Helps us to focus on what we need to do now, to ensure we get to where we want to be more quickly than we thought possible.

Thirdly, we can look at all the good things we can now expect to pop into our lives. For a start, we can treasure each moment for what it is and know that it is only through our own efforts that we have created this change.

Fourthly, know that the emotional or physical pain we may feel has some benefits. For you can now start to peel away at those deep layers of what is not working and decide to come up with a better solution to this situation. We can make it start working towards our own happiness, not against it. Research it, meditate and get better informed about solutions. We may choose to talk it over with a close friend, or maybe a professional, so as to learn what we need to do in order to change the situation.

“The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.” Jim Rohn

 

By Ron Trustin

Motivating baby boomers to see the world with fresh eyes.

Read more articles from Ron here.